If you're stupid enough to stay with him and he's still nagging, tell him you'll do it - just after showing him a video of a penis extension operation with graphic close-ups and suggesting he does the same.
Some female colleagues were giggling at a magazine article about a guy who'd had a penis extension, and because his name was Dave, one of them shrieked, "Oooh look, Dave's had his chopper enlarged!" I pretended not to hear, but felt so sick and demoralised I thought I was going to collapse.
The phrase "size matters", in the minds of both men and women, really means penis size, and some men in pursuit of improving their length have gone in for penis extensions. The sad news is they don't work.
The top five male procedures at HMG were penis extensions (at a cost around pounds 3,000),followed by rhinoplasty (nose job), liposuction (costing pounds 3,540 for thechest),otoplasty (ear correction),Botox (pounds 200)and Collagen.
Women form the bulk of those seeking to improve their look, but Irish men are getting in on the act as well - with everything from fat removal, nose-jobs, ear re-shaping, non-surgical laser hair removal and yes -ouch - penis extensions, known in the trade as a PE.