Ted Bundy

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A notorious serial killer (1946-1989) active between 1973 and 1978, who killed at least 30 people—typical victim, white female age 15–25—and possibly many more.
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According to his various complaints, Riches has had his sideburns stolen from him by Elvis Presley, his larynx taken from him by Milli Vanilli lookalikes under orders from country singer Carrie Underwood, been forced into slave labor on the moon and at Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory, had half his brain stolen and sold on eBay for a mere $4,275, and been the focus of a plot masterminded by Unabomber Ted Kaczynski and all the Teds in the world, including Ted Kennedy, Ted Bundy, Ted Turner, Bill and Ted, Ted Nugent, teddy bears, and Teddy Ruxspin, to further cause him injury.